An exciting lake community coming soon to Northern Alberta
Teck is gone, a swinging new crew is taking over.
Lake Fort Hills
Act now to reserve your lot, the community of Lake Fort Hills will sell out as fast as the south pit is filling up!
Given the leak
New creak front lots now available at Lake Fort Hills phase 2b3.
RE: AER Statement on Suncor Release of Water
You know when you are a teenage and just discovering the joy that is a dIPA, and how sometimes after a lot of those you may need to run your bedding through the laundry the next day; that is all that happened here at Lake Fort Hills.
We just released some perfectly safe liquid into a place it really normally would not be (this is a know risk of bringing Rich on board) we are taking appropriate action (asking the fish to sign NDA’s) and we expect this not to have any effects on operations at site, or the NPV of the entire LFH’s operation as it was already a massive water management project.
Lake Fort Hills, under new management, “Now We Fuck”
After a hiring race worthy of a d-grade drama Lake Fort Hills (a Suncor Community) has a new leadership team helmed by the estimable Rich “Tricky Dicky” Kruger, the development plan for communities around LFH’s has been modified to include an adults only component including a topless beach (Site Prep) , a pineapple based “entertainment” district (tentatively names Whore Prep Plant) featuring Bitumen slurry wrestling as well as an onsite STD clinic (final extraction).
Lots will be larger than previously planned in order to accommodate enlarged houses envisioned to hold multiple…. Well it is going to be like SBF’s pad in Bahamas with multiple accessory dwelling units for well people who are on the outs from the main thrapple at the moment. There will also be a boutique hotel development with both long term (for the mistress’ mistress) and short term (for a fun weekend) stays – with of course a keg in the lobby to go pick people up to add to the nights fun.
About our developer
“We would like to thank Little Mark for his contributions (mainly digging this big giant hole) that has given Tricky Dick so much opportunity to showcase his leadership at this asset”- LFH BoD
With a history reaching back to the Devonian age this project was millennia in the making. More recently under the we took inspiration from Shell and their water issues at Muskeg River and decided to take that up a level and turn our entire south pit into an exciting new lake front community (as soon as the aquifer finished draining).
With a recent history of successful projects Voyageur mine, Voyageur Upgrader, Syncrude-Suncor interconnecting pipeline, and numerous fire rebuilds under the leadership of Mark Little you know your lake front homes will be built to the highest standards.
NOW SELLING PHASE 2:
After being overwhelmed with demand for future lake front property, Little Markey developments pleased to announce Phase Two has reached FID and will begin selling External Tailings Pond front property
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Come see the future of lake front property.
Drop by and take a look at at lot, and if you don’t like it we promise not to throw you into primary crushing (that is reserved for workers)
